Complaining Pt. 2

Alright doods, fifth post. This is a new month, and a new year. Had a little trip to Penang from 15th Dec to 28th Dec, that means I escaped the tsunami (some people probably wonder if that's a good or a bad thing). This is the second part about complaining (duh! I don't read my own titles do I?), of which how many parts it might end up with, I cannot confirm. Yah, I have a lot of things to complain about...In fact, there's a nagging suspicion that I might have titled my blog wrongly cause it might mutate into Frequently Unquelled Complaints~

Well anyway, this blog's been a bit too clean for too long, time to shoot the BS!

Q: How do humans express themselves?

A: Humans have many ways of expressing themselves (I'll only touch on the vocal aspects), here's a partial list with categorisation and usage:

1. Amplification of the human voice to create noises. Commonly associated with ANGER.

Eg. Shouting, screaming, yelling, hollering, kbkb-ing (noisy everywhere)...

Very useful techniques which are capable of waking the dead, scaring the undead, getting a point across and generally keeping people away from you.

Warning: Using these techniques with people around you may result in feedback as they show you that they are also capable of, if not much more capable of giving your ears a good ringing. One good shout deserves another eh?

2. Rain and thunder which originate from the clouds of sadness. Commonly associated with SADNESS.

Eg. Crying, weeping, wailing, mourning, bawling, groaning, kbkb-ing (the original meaning)...

Useful to prevent massive buildup of sadness clouds which can create unbalanced inner environment and lung cancer (no, it's not yet been proven, and crying doesn't remove the harmful effects of smoking). In case you're wondering where the lightning goes, look into the eyes of a crying person and you'll know...

3. Signs of madness, stupidity, ridicule and most importantly, BS! Commonly associated with HAPPINESS.

Eg. Laughing, giggling, snorting, sniggering, chortling, rip-roaring, kbkb-ing (noisy in restaurants)...

Useful to make yourself look insane, stupid, ridiculous and bullshitty. Highly infectious and usually spreads around faster if the original stimulus is manifested for all.

4. Methods of communication. Commonly associated with HUMANS.

Eg. Talking, whispering, mumbling, lying and kbkb-ing (noisy in libraries)...

Useful for getting a point across 'economically'. Also useful for showing intelligence, cunning and basically the existence and functionality of your brain.

5. Aural aesthetics. Commonly associated with the INNER MUSICIAN.

Eg. Singing, whistling, rapping (I don't like it, but it counts as one), humming and kbkb-ing (noisy to the wrong audience)...

Useful when you are showering, karaokeing, serenading and trying to annoy/entertain if you are hopelessly out of pitch all the time.

6. Distortion and desecration. Commonly associated with CHAOS.

Eg. Cursing, swearing, blaspheming, insulting, animal noise-making and kbkb-ing (noisy in society)...

Useful when you want to show your inner bestiality, put down other people (and yourself simultaneously) and make yourself a nuisance in the so-called civilised world.

7. Authority and seniority. Commonly associated with NATURAL HUMANS.

Eg. Nagging, lecturing, scolding, complaining and kbkb-ing (noisy to the victim)

Useful for trying to show your 'authority' and incapability of getting what you want. Doesn't always mean that the thing you want is bad though!

P.S. All the 7 points above have something in common...you might have noticed that kbkb-ing is present in all of them, but that's because one man's music is another man's noise. Apart from that ubiquitous fact, the other thing is that an insane human is capable of expressing all 7 of them. Yes! All humans are insane and unsound in mind!