All hail Marat Tsar-fin, the Russian Torturer!

Shucks...I'm typing this out after watching 45 minutes of the Federer-Safin match. The first set had just ended and already it's an exciting one with Federer leading 7-5.

P.S. Most of the following is typed out as the match is progressing, so the flow of the post is rather 'spontaneous' in a sense. Please bear with me as I chronicle this utterly epic match.

Damn! Safin made TWO crucial unforced errors which ended up giving the set away.

Federer seems to be under immense pressure against the 1.93m Russian. No longer does he have those crazy wide serves which wiped Agassi off the court. He also made the most number of unforced errors (11) in a set since this tournament began.

Safin seems well equipped to take out Federer. Big serves, forceful groundstrokes and solid overheads. Oh and one thing, Safin is able to dictate his heavy groundstrokes to form V-shapes on the court. Those did some damage to Federer's seemingly invincible combination of fleet-feet and fantastic slice backhands.

The thing about Federer's slice backhands seem to me that he uses them really well. Especially when he seeks to take off the pressure that his opponent is exerting on him. After all, the balls that have been hit by said stroke travel low and slow over the net; it gives him time to get back into position after his opponent has usually forced him to either side of the court. It also gives his opponent a slightly harder time in returning the ball.

On a side note, every time Federer performs a backhand, he looks like he's waving a magic wand. I'm talking about the motion, not the result :) Oh and there was a 'funny' part when Federer hit a forehand shot wide; it sounded to me like he was shrieking like a little girl hehehe~

Federer's not his usual self today it seems. Making loads of weird errors. Looks more nervous than usual too.

Oh! Now in the 2nd set, Safin had broken Federer's serve in around the 5th game, and now it's up to the Swiss to fight back to prevent a 1 set-all from happening...

Wow! Safin just pulled off a magnificent dropshot to win him the 2nd set 6-4!!! Honestly it looks like Federer's not playing as well as when he did Agassi, but perhaps he's just afraid if he played too well Safin might hammer him in with his Head racket...along with fellow Head endorsee, Andre Agassi :D

Safin on the other hand is doing damn well today. Up till now, the 2nd set, he's only had ONE double fault...compared to Federer's relatively numerous service-giveaways.

3rd set, Safin is now returning Federer the favour of committing unforced errors. As I type now, Safin is down 0-3. It doesn't help that Federer seems to be upping his game with a lot less errors and more crafty shots manufactured to wear down the Russian machine.

Oh goodie, Safin managed to break back and now awaiting his turn to serve. Federer's holding serve at 4-3.

The good thing about having Safin is that he's prone to entertaining displays of playfulness and emotion. So...I'll stop calling him a Russian machine...instead I'll nickname him Marat Tsar-fin with his tyrannical serves :D

Well I've got a nickname for the Swiss too: Roger Featherer hehe. He's so dextrous, with feather-light feet and touch on the balls. It's time we stopped calling him Federer Express...seems like it's getting stale.

Oh man, Safin smashed a racket into the ground after committing an unforced error which allowed Federer to have 2 set points. Anyway, Federer then got the 3rd set with 7-5. Argh...I wanna watch Safin win some more sets!

4th set, Federer serves first. During Safin's serve, it was evident that Federer's losing his cool. Breaking under the constantly increasing pressure of Tsar-fin. I don't know why but Federer always seems to have insect-encounters. This time he used his racket to push it away though. It might have been distracting him, cause prior to that he seemed to be shouting at the ground...Hmm, I wonder if the insect was Russian-trained :D

Woah Safin's doing a great job pushing Federer to his limits sia...amazing play from the 'Tsar'...

Wah! Now Safin is the Russian torturer! Always tightening the screws (read: tennis balls) of pressure by hammering them in and stretching Federer's physical and mental limits on the rack-et (pun intended). If you watched the match you'll hear Federer's tortured screams of anguish and grunts of agony. I've been watching Russian torture carried out on a big scale...

I will make the big bold prediction now and say that Safin will get Federer to succumb to the immense torture he's inflicting upon him. Note: This sentence is typed out at 2hrs 45mins into the match. Let's see if my 'voodoo' mouth gets Federer going...

Now with Federer leading 5-4 and Safin serving, he's just pulled off an amazing tyco shot which had Federer THROWING HIS RACKET INTO THE GROUND! First time I've seen it! And possibly first time anyone has seen it! Imagine the torture...

Like the agents in Matrix remarking about Neo: "Only human"...

OH MY!!! Safin has won the 4th set with a tiebreaker! 7-6 (8)! Federer committed TWO unforced errors in a row to give it away. Returning the favour after Safin did the same earlier on? Perhaps...

Wow, I must applaud Federer for attempting the 'castration' shot though. It's the one between the legs. He actually tried it when it was his MATCH POINT. The ball ended up hitting the net, but seriously, he's really got balls to try it at such a decisive moment; cause this is what could allow Safin the torturer to utterly break the defending champion.

This is quite simply a balls-to-the-walls match! Now awaiting the grand finale of the 5th set to play out...I've been watching the last 20 minutes with bated breath everytime the ball is in play. If I were older I might just die of heart attack!

Right now there's a slight delay cause Federer is getting some massage on his forehand. The commentator is speculating that it might be due to the intense power of Safin's shots...I mean like...WOAH!

In the first 5 games of the 5th set, Safin has been pulling off some dastardly impressive shots. Seems like he's getting better and better throughout the very match itself! It's currently past 3hrs 30mins, even if Federer does manage to get through, he'd be so damaged by this match that if my hope of Roddick gets through, he could blow Federer away thanks to Safin's incessant punishment.

Alright!!! Safin is now leading 5-2!!! Next game will be served by a noticeably uncomfortable Federer to stay in the match. Damn...Safin's gonna make history tonight!

Oh btw, today is Safin's birthday! Great present coming up for him I say~

Further applause for Federer please. Faced with pressure that threatens to choke any normal player into making dumb errors, he has managed to break back into the set with the current score of Safin leading 5-4, Federer to serve.

Oh man, Safin's missed 3 crucial match points. Damn it, my heart's hanging by a capillary, I'm under immense pressure watching this match...getting breathless. Finish Federer off Safin! I'm cheering for you!

YES!!! YES!!! YES!!! Safin broke Federer on the last point and claimed the match as his birthday present! Oh man, I think I'm even more excited than Safin. I was hopping around my room as the last point was playing out...the adrenaline is too much for me to take...

Yeah! Jim Courier gave Safin a hug as emotional support and later on in the interview the audience sang Safin a birthday song! I think he's never had a better birthday than this.

Btw, my nickname for Safin has a whole new meaning to it now that he's won the defending champion! Check this out from Merriam-Webster Online (Tsar is the actual Russian word as you can see, as compared to the New Latin 'Czar')

Main Entry: czar
Pronunciation: 'zär, '(t)sär
Function: noun
Etymology: New Latin czar, from Russian tsar', from Old Russian tsisari, from Gothic kaisar, from Greek or Latin; Greek, from Latin Caesar -- more at CAESAR
1 : EMPEROR; specifically : the ruler of Russia until the 1917 revolution
2 : one having great power or authority [a banking czar]

Let me describe Tsar-fin's play today as having great power and authority! Emperor of tennis...

I need to go get my dinner and rest...my body can't take this amount of adrenaline anymore...thanks for reading till here, if you have. Till tomorrow doods! Oh yah, statistics are here before I forget. Thank you Federer and Safin! You've blown my mind totally.